That's enough.

Do you ever have that feeling like you just don't measure up?  Like everything, and everyone around you just makes you feel so small and insignificant?
Lately, I've been feeling a little that way...okay a lot that way.
I want to do the right things, but I feel like I keep doing them wrong.  I'm trying to say the right things, but i just word vomit up the wrong stuff.  Its so hard when you are trying to explain how something makes you feel, and every word you say just seems to make things worse.  The to everyone else you come out sounding like a brat, but on the inside all you feel is insecure, unheard, and completely misunderstood.  It's so frustrating when you try so incredibly hard to do the right things, and you still come out in the wrong.
That's how I feel right now.
In all aspects of my life.
I'm trying all day, everyday, to be enough....and I just don't measure up.


In thinking about these feelings, I remembered these words from a church song that I love...

"And all of you, is more than enough for all of me,

 for every thirst and every need, you satisfy me, and all I have in you is more than enough.  

More than all i want, more than all I need.  You are more than enough for me.  

More than all I know, more than all i can say, you are more than enough for me."

...and I realize, I am not enough, nor will I ever be enough if I keep looking for that satisfaction in all the wrong places.  I don't need to be enough for you, or you, or even you.  I just need to be enough for HIM, and know that He is more than enough for me.

I'm done striving to "measure up" to those around me.  The people who have mauled my beliefs of who I am and what I'm worth.  Im done looking for love and acceptance in all the wrong places.  And I no longer will seek acknowledgment, or approval, from those who wish to tell me what I am and am not capable and worthy of.  I am loved by the only one who "is love" and therefore I am worthy of all that he provides.  I am worthy of his greatness.  And through him I am enough.